It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™
CyberJokester Doug Bulger sends along this site of special interest to special people: Bookshelf Porn. Seriously. If you love libraries, this link's for you!
http://bookshelfporn.com
Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.
Today's CyberJoke 3000™
'Twas the week after Christmas and all through the house,
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled; the eggnog I'd taste
At the holiday parties was now 'round my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
Then I walked to the store. (Less a walk than a lumber!)
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared,
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese,
And the way I'd not said, "No, thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt,
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt,
I said to myself, as only I can,
"You can't spend the winter disguised as a man!"
So away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
'Til all my additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie, not even a lick.
I'll only chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore,
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!
To hear jokes instead of reading them, download "Al's Comedy Club" for your iPhone, iPod, or iPad. It's less than a buck!
For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.
To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.
To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.
Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.
__._,_.___
No comments:
Post a Comment