It's Al Lowe's
Seriously? Why does hitting the top of a beer bottle produce a foam volcano? Here's why:
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Today's
After the third time he yelled "It's a trap!" to a girl at the bar, it was clear: Admiral Ackbar was an awful wingman.
A man woke up in the ICU, stiff, sore, tubes in his nose and arms, a catheter, wires everywhere, in terrible pain -- but with a gorgeous nurse hovering over him. Obviously, he'd been in a serious accident, but he had no memory of anything happening. She sympathetically said, "You may not feel anything from the waist down." But he knew he'd survive because, summoning all his strength, he took her hand and mumbled, "Can I feel your t¡ts, then?"
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