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Today's CyberJoke 3000™
Election Humor: "If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates" -- Jay Leno. "The problem with political jokes is they get elected" -- Henry Cate. "We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office" – Aesop. "If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these State of the Union speeches, there wouldn't be any inducement to go to heaven" -- Will Rogers. "Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river" -- Nikita Khrushchev. "When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it" -- Clarence Darrow. "Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, buy more tunnel" -- John Quinton. "Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you" – anonymous. "Politics is called the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first" -- Ronald Reagan. "Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich by promising to protect each from the other" -- Oscar Ameringer. "I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them" -- Adlai Stevenson. "A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country" -- Tex Guinan. "I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians" -- Charles de Gaulle. "Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks" -- Doug Larson.
What's blue and screws old people? Hypothermia!
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