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Today's
To make it stand, you wet it. To make it wet, you suck it. To make it stiff, you lick it. To get it in, you push it. Man, threading a needle is tough!
Old Mr. Rugelbaum suffered from a rare disease which his doctor said could be cured by drinking human milk. "Where do I get human milk?" asked Rugelbaum. "Well, Mrs. Finkelstein just had a baby girl; maybe she can help." So, every day Rugelbaum went to Finkelstein's house for his daily "medicine." Mrs. Finkelstein was a dark-eyed, big-breasted young woman, who, in spite of herself, gradually grew aroused as Rugelbaum lapped at her ripe breasts. After a week or so, she whispered to him, "Tell me, Mr. Rugelbaum: do you like it?" "Mmmm, yes. Wonderful," he sighed. She hesitated, her lips parted and eyes aglow. "Is there anything else you'd enjoy?" Rugelbaum murmured softly between slurps, "As a matter of fact there is." "What?" she whispered. Rugelbaum said, "Maybe an oatmeal cookie?"
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