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Today's
Why Is It? When your hands are covered in grease, your nose will itch and you'll need to pee. Whenever you drop anything, it will roll to the least accessible place possible. The probability that you're being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act. Wrong numbers are never busy; someone always answers. Whichever traffic lane you change to will always move slower than the one you left. (This also applies to lines you stand in.) Whenever your body is fully wet, the phone will ring. The chance of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with. When you try to show that something doesn't work, it will. The people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last and will leave during the performance. As soon as you sit down with a cup of hot coffee, your boss will want you to do something which will take until your coffee is cold. If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers. The chance of messy food falling is directly correlated to the newness and price of the carpet beneath it. If the clothes fit, they're ugly. As soon as you find a product you really like, they'll stop making it. If you don't feel well, make a doctor's appointment; by the time you get in, you'll feel better; if you don't make an appointment, you'll stay sick.
What's the best thing about gardening? Getting down and dirty with your hoes!
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