Thursday, December 29, 2016

[cyberjoke3000] December 30, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

Watch as Nat & Lo explain how Google created its new computer voice and the intricacies that went into making your phone talk to you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnGNfz7JiZ8

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

A woman woke from a dream and told her husband, "There I was, no more dents, a new paint job, waxed to a high gloss, surrounded by men in jumpsuits with polishing cloths!" He sleepily mumbled, "Sounds to me like you had an auto body experience."

There once was a young man named Eugene / Who invented a screwing machine / Concave and convex, / It served either sex / And played with itself in-between! 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:

Wednesday, December 28, 2016

[cyberjoke3000] December 29, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

So what really is the Internet? A decade ago we all laughed at Alaska Senator Ted Stevens' "series of tubes" comment, but he wasn't that far off, at least as far as Google's undersea cables are concerned. Watch as Nat & Lo explain:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9R4tznCNB0 

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

Tomorrow, I'm going to get up early and go for a run. I might also win the lottery. The odds are similar.

Vito and Juliana were having their usual battle of the sexes. "Italian men are all stupid animals," screamed Juliana. Vito replied, "Oh, yeah? I'll have you know it was an Italian man who invented the toilet seat!" She said, "Maybe so, but it was an Italian woman who put the hole in it!" 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:

[cyberjoke3000] December 28, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

CyberJokester Vincent Rizzuto sends along this 10-minute video by Zapatou of 367 short clips showing the best of the web in 2016. I'm amazed at how many of these videos I've seen! How about you?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efoQYVJt03M 

 

My apologies for being so late with today’s joke; I got sick yesterday and spent the evening and most of today in bed. So here comes tomorrow’s joke!

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

Only a fraction of adults understand that there's a fine line between numerator and denominator!

What's a kind way to tell your husband that you've reached menopause? "Honey! We're out of eggs!" 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:

Monday, December 26, 2016

[cyberjoke3000] December 27, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

The NY Times recently posted their selection of “The Year in Pictures.”
http://nyti.ms/2ihSqyo

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

My brain has too many tabs open.

The wife wanted sex but the husband couldn't get it up. She told him, "Honey, don't be embarrassed! The same thing happened to my sister's husband. He fixed his problem by thinking about last summer's college sorority bikini car wash." Suddenly everything worked! The surprised wife said, "Great! So thinking about college girls works for you?" Her husband said, "No. I was thinking about your sister!" 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:

Sunday, December 25, 2016

[cyberjoke3000] December 26, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

I hope you’re having a wonderful holiday season. Here are this week’s sight gags:
http://www.allowe.com/humor/sight-gags.html?PicNumber=5681 

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

You Don't Want to Hear Your Stewardess Say: "Welcome aboard, sir. You pretty much have the whole cabin to yourself. We had a large group going to a psychics convention but, this morning, they all cancelled!"

How is anal sex like spinach? If you were forced to have it as a child, you probably don't like it as an adult! 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:

Thursday, December 22, 2016

[cyberjoke3000] December 23, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

CyberJokester David Caine sends along this Christmas Star Wars video: "Chewie Sings Silent Night"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vd79mpzBnJ4 

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

"Mommy! I know what I'm going to ask Santa for." "What?" "An elf." "An elf? Why?"   "Because Santa's elves make all his toys, so why ask for toys when, if I get an elf, I'll have toys for life!"

Shopping for a new nightgown, a woman tried her luck at Victoria's Secret and, surprisingly, found exactly what she wanted. Waiting to pay, she noticed the young woman in front of her had the same nightgown. That confirmed what she suspected all along: despite being over fifty, she was still "with it." She proudly announced to the 20-something before her, "Looks like we have the same tastes." The young woman replied, "Yes. I think it's the perfect Christmas present for my grandmother!" 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:

Wednesday, December 21, 2016

[cyberjoke3000] December 22, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

Somehow I confused yesterday’s link to Louis Armstrong reciting "The Night Before Christmas” with my laptop’s LoJack security company! My apologies. Here’s the real link. (And thanks to Rodney Paquin, the first to point out my error.)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-pe_DCJtOmI

CyberJokester Jeff Flagg sends along this video from the Holderness Family: "Wine Pairings For The Holidays."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oy4P9CjQsi8

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

You Might Be A Scrooge if... The only three spirits you see on Christmas Eve are gin, vodka and bourbon. You turn on your sprinklers to keep away the carolers. You buy all your Christmas gifts at the convenience store. You get your Christmas tree from a park. Your Christmas dinner is a six-pack and a Slim Jim. You think "Ho, ho, ho!" is a line from a Rocky movie. Your holiday decorations are rotted pumpkins.

"Dear Santa, I'm writing to tell you that I've been naughty, but it was worth it, you fat, judgmental bastard! Little Johnny" 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:

Tuesday, December 20, 2016

[cyberjoke3000] December 21, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

What could put you more in the Christmas spirit than "The Night Before Christmas?" How about Louis Armstrong reciting "The Night Before Christmas?"
https://my.absolute.com

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

What kind of music do elves like best? Wrap music!

Little Suzi was so proud of her Christmas presents: her first watch and her first perfume. She made herself a pest all morning, showing everyone her watch and insisting that they sniff her perfume. But before the preacher arrived for Christmas dinner, her mother told her, "If you bother the minister with your watch or perfume, I'll send you to your room." She did well but by desert, she just couldn't hold her tongue any more. She told the preacher, "If you hear anything or smell anything ...it's me!" 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:

Bantu Menjaga Keamanan Akun Anda

Yahoo
Pengguna Yahoo yang kami hormati,

Kami memiliki komitmen atas keamanan akun Anda dan kami melakukan langkah ekstra untuk menjaga keamanan akun Anda.

Kami perhatikan Anda belum mengubah kata sandi Yahoo akhir-akhir ini. Harap ubah kata sandi atau gunakan Kunci Akun Yahoo, yaitu metode autentikasi sederhana yang secara bersamaan menyingkirkan penggunaan kata sandi di Yahoo. Pelajari lebih lanjut di sini: https://login.yahoo.com/accountkey/setup.

Sebentar lagi Anda akan diwajibkan untuk mengubah kata sandi.

Untuk informasi lebih lanjut tentang sumber daya keamanan kami, harap kunjungi halaman Bantuan Keamanan Yahoo yang ada di https://help.yahoo.com/kb/index?locale=id_ID&page=content&y=PROD_ACCT&id=SLN2080&actp=productlink.

Hormat kami,

Bob Lord
Direktur Keamanan Informasi
Yahoo
Yahoo
 
Webpage
 
Kebijakan Privasi

RefID: 
Posted by at No comments:

Monday, December 19, 2016

[cyberjoke3000] December 20, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

I dare you to watch this video all the way through without smiling! The USAF Band, Strings, Chorus and Dancers perform their holiday medley to the public:
https://www.youtube.com/embed/khQN5ylb3H0  

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

Santa goes up and down so many chimneys that this year he got a flue shot!

How Christmas Trees are Better than Women: Christmas trees don't care how many other trees you've had in the past. Christmas trees don't get mad when you use exotic electrical devices. You can feel a Christmas tree before you take it home. Christmas trees don't get mad when you look up underneath. When you are done with a Christmas tree, you can just leave it on the curb. Christmas trees don't get jealous around other Christmas trees. Christmas trees don't care if you watch football all day. Christmas trees don't get mad when you tie them up and throw them in the back of your pickup. Christmas trees don't care if you keep an artificial one in the closet "just in case." 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:

Sunday, December 18, 2016

[cyberjoke3000] December 19, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

It’s time for a few Christmas jokes. But no Christmas sight gags!
http://www.allowe.com/humor/sight-gags.html?PicNumber=5671

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

A blonde got a pet python for Christmas but by summer it was so huge that she put it on Craigslist. A man phoned her and asked, "Is it big?" She replied, "It's massive." "How many feet?" The blonde said, "None, silly. It's a snake!"

A proud father watched as his young daughter made a snowman with her little friend. When the little boy said, "To finish it, I'll go in the kitchen and get a carrot," Dad was shocked to hear his sweet little girl say, "Make it two. He needs a nose, too!" 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:

Thursday, December 15, 2016

[cyberjoke3000] December 16, 2016



It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™

CyberJokester Vincent Rizzuto sends a new video of Ken Block: "Drifting through London." How do they get major cities to shut down their streets?!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrqYohBV58o 

Got a joke to share with me? Send it here. If you received this email from a friend, why not start your own free subscription? It's easy. See below.

AL

Today's CyberJoke 3000™

A Cherokee Indian, guest speaker at a local elementary school, told the children about his tribe and its traditions and then mentioned that there were no swear words in the Cherokee language. Little Johnny raised his hand. "But what if you smash your thumb while hammering a nail?" The Indian replied, "That's when we use your language!"

Definition of a Mistress: Something between a mister and a mattress. 

For a free subscription to CyberJoke 3000™
If you can read, you qualify! And it really is free.
You can learn more about it here.
Every past issue is here.
To join, send a blank email here.
To quit, send a blank email here.

To change your email address
Go here, unsubscribe your old address, then resubscribe with your new address.

To contact me
For more humor, visit allowe.com.
Submit your jokes for CyberJoke 3000™ here.
Send your comments and feedback here.

Copyright information
I am not the author of these jokes and I do not claim any copyright privileges concerning them. I assume them to be in the public domain. I do my best not to use copyrighted material. If you see any, tell me and I'll remove it immediately. You're welcome to send these jokes to anyone, as long as you forward this entire email, complete with all this information intact.



__._,_.___
Posted by: "Al Lowe" <al@allowe.com>



__,_._,___
Posted by at No comments:
Newer Posts Older Posts Home
Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)