It's Al Lowe's CyberJoke 3000™
It's been quite a while since I last updated my web site's Videos page, but I now have 74 brand new ones to share with you. Enjoy! But not all of them today, okay? Save a few for next time, okay?
http://www.allowe.com/Humor/video,theNewest.htm
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Today's CyberJoke 3000™
Body Statistics: It takes food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. One human hair can support six pounds. The average man's pen¡s is three times the length of his thumb. Human thighbones are stronger than concrete. A woman's heart beats faster than a man's. There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet. Women blink twice as often as men. The average person's skin weighs twice as much as his brain. Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself while you stand still. If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it. Women reading this are now finished. Men reading this are still checking their thumbs!
Sung to the tune of I Will Survive: At first I was afraid. I was petrified. / When you said you had ten inches, Lord, I almost died! / But I'd spent so many years, just waiting for a man that long, / That I grew strong. And I knew that I could take you on. / But there you are, another lie! / I was ready for a Big Mac but you brought me a French fry! / I should have known that it was bullsh¡t, / just a sad pathetic dream. Should have known there was no anaconda lurking in those jeans! / Go on now. Go! Walk out the door. / Don't you promise me ten inches then turn up with only four! / Weren't you a jerk to think I wouldn't find you out!? / Don't you know we're only joking when we say size don't count? / I will survive! I will survive! / Cause as long as I have batteries / My sex life's gonna thrive! / I will always have good sex, / With a handful of latex! / I will survive! I will survive! Hey! Hey! / It took all my self-control not to laugh out loud / When I saw your little wiener standing tall and proud! / But to hell with your ego and to hell with all your needs, / Now I'm saving all my lovin' for a cordless multi-speed! / I will survive! I will survive! / Cause as long as I have batteries / My sex life's gonna thrive! / I will always have good sex, / With a handful of latex! / I will survive! I will survive! Hey! Hey!
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