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Today's
You May Need A New Lawyer If: When the prosecutors see your lawyer, they high-five each other. During your initial consultation, he tries to sell you Amway. He tells you that his last good case was a "Budweiser." He picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose." He asks a hostile witness to "pull my finger." During the trial, you catch him playing games on his phone. Every few minutes he yells, "I call Jack Daniels to the stand!" and then drinks a shot. He gives the jury the finger. He places a large "No Refunds" sign on the defense table.
Why did the butcher divorce his wife? He caught her eating his competitor's meat!
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