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Today's
Mary was six months pregnant and ravenous. As she spooned up some seconds, her husband had to comment. She gave him the classic, "Remember: I'm eating for two." He smiled and said, "True, but how many are you exercising for?"
One Sunday, a small church's pastor found a pink envelope containing $1,000. The next Sunday, it happened again. The following Sunday, he paid careful attention as the offering was collected. Sure enough, one elderly lady put in a distinctive pink envelope. The curious pastor asked her, "Mary, I notice that you've put $1,000 in the collection plate the past three weeks. Are you sure you can afford that much?" "Oh, yes. Every week my son sends me $10,000 and I tithe to the church." The pastor was amazed. "Your son is very successful! What does he do?" "He's a veterinarian." The pastor said, "An honorable profession, but I had no idea they made that much money. Where does he practice?" She answered proudly, "He has two new cat houses, one in
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